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Vent History X

The Vent was born on a cold November morning, to a crack-whore named Josie. Not so long ago the Vent came to a time in her life when hair started to grow in new places, her breasts became more noticeable and her waistline transformed from an uninviting plain to a vast playground of curves, and every twenty eight days… well you get the picture. That time has come and gone for the Vent and the woman left after being drained by an unappreciative town, is but a hollow shell of the innocent girl we once knew.

There is no doubt that she regrets her exploits and if she had the strength left in her tattered, oversexed body, she would turn her head toward the heavens and beg for another chance; a chance to regain her misspent youth; a chance to love instead of hate… A chance to escape the fear she feels with every stranger’s cold touch. Her self-worth is sustained only by what is left of her passing beauty, but… once upon a time…

 

THE WAKE UP CALL

 

Two dirt-poor brothers, we’ll call them Mike and Billy Vent, ended up in a sh*t town, we’ll call it Kingsville Texas. Imagine a place one-tenth the size of Corpus. Then, take away the beach, the bare-bone malls, and add in an overwhelming population of metal heads, hicks and crooked law enforcement, and you will have some tiny sense of the hell that is Kingsville, Texas.

After years of being chased off by Texas A&M University Kingsville campus police for skateboarding on the only fair supply of concrete and painted curbs in town, these two brothers would eventually call TAMUK their own higher learning institute (and combined they would forge through enough college hours to qualify for one shiny college degree). It was there The Vent “zine” or mini magazine was conceived. A modest epistle, birthed as a medium for those rejected by the campus literary magazine. A home for unplaced prose and forsaken free verse, but it was so much more than that. The Vent was the manifestation of a dream, the answer to a riddle wrapped in an enigma covered in secret sauce and piled into a Dorito shell.

 

THE DROP IN

 

As the Vent began to garner praise throughout TAMUK, along came “Mr. T” a key player in the Vent magazines success. T. proved to be very informed as well as opinionated in all things pop culture and helped very much to legitimize the zine. Writing pieces as The Vent’s resident elitist he won the hearts of many shorthaired girls with thick-framed glasses all over South Texas. T. would soon however part ways with the Vent after the Vent Brothers became hungry for controversy.

 

ENEMIES

 

The Vent reigned on the TAMUK campus for a few years. We made many people laugh, some people cry. Some memorable confrontations include “The Time Barry Barryhill Threatened To Kick Our A$$ After The Vent Alleged That He Took It In The Rear”, as well as the “Verderber Incident” which took place when Mike Verderber would not let his girlfriend take a copy of the Vent. And how could anybody forget the ‘Battle with the Band’ of ’03, in which the TAMUK marching band confronted the two Vent brothers in a parking lot, in true West Side Story fashion after the Vent published a not-so-flattering review.

 

 

GONE QUIET

 

As the years past The Vent lost momentum and the Vent Brothers rivaled as siblings do. Mike would go on to Austin, LA, Nashville and eventually Comedy Central in New York, while Billy was either imprisoned or married. It would seem that the Cancer that is the town of Kingsville had metastasized all through the Vent’s young defenseless body.

 

WELCOME TO WHEREVER YOU ARE

 

It sometimes takes a near death experience to bring about dramatic change, and so Billy Vent took his dream and trekked 40 miles North-Eastish to the small-town city of Corpus Christi. By coincidence, the Vent’s old friend T. made the move to CC right around the same time.

 

SLOW NEWS DAY

 

With Mike AWOL, Billy and T. did their best to expose Corpus Christi to a new form of written entertainment. T. being adamantly opposed to the resurrection of the Vent, due to past complications , teamed up with Billy to start ‘Corpus Christi Daily News: a monthly publication’. CCDN was short lived, but the concept would go on to become the magazine you now know. Also, somewhere around here there was a rouge Corpus Christi issue of The Vent released at TAMUCC that stirred some controversy due to a Reservoir Dogs quote containing the word faggot. Due to a lack of funds this venture too, was short lived.

 

FULL DISCLOSURE

 

After several attempts to launch numerous projects the two original Vent writers decided to take a different approach. Billy had come across a publication called FYI managed by none other than Mrs. J.J. Gottsch. The two scheduled a meeting with the editor and before long they were the proud owners of a column entitled “In Other News”, usually one-quarter of the last page. A few months later Billy would request a full page, and be denied. The reluctance of the editor to see Billy’s vision for her magazine would eventually cause tension, and when his brilliant article on The Legend of Billie Jean for the November ’06 issue of FYI was sabotaged, he knew it was time to move on. T., however stayed with FYI, for a few months continuing to write the Secret Stash column on film and music, under the pseudonym L.E. Tust.

 

HERE TODAY

 

Motivated by an overwhelming amount of frustrated writer’s angst, three months later Billy released The Vent Daily: a monthly publication (Comedy. Culture. Commentary.), which has since become the longest-running, most-circulated alternative monthly publication in Corpus Christi. T. made a brief appearance in one issue of The Vent Daily, only to burn the final bridge connecting his elitist island to the moron mainland. For the most part Billy with the help of one or two writers keep the Vent alive and kicking.

 

TOMORROW

 

Over the past 6 years of publishing, The Vent has seen some publications wither and others expire. Due to the grass roots administration and almost zero overhead of the Vent, we are and will continue to be a fixture in our city by the sea.

 

To be a part of the Vent contact William Henneberger: [email protected]

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