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Police Dept. New Robot Car Subject of Rape Allegations


The newest addition to the Corpus Christi police force, PC the Patrol Car, is denying allegations that he sexually assaulted a female patrol car Saturday June 24, saying the report was “false, vindictive and retaliatory.”

“I have been falsely accused of sexual assault by a patrol car I formerly dated,” PC said during a press conference at his lawyer’s office, with his fiancee at his side. “Any and all relations that have occurred were always of a consensual nature.”

PC said he recently learned about the accusations and is cooperating with the Texas Rangers’ investigation into the matter.

“I am confident that the investigation will exonerate me of the malicious accusation made against me,” he beeped.


District Attorney Carlos Valdez said Monday his office is assisting with the investigation. Valdez said a patrol car in her 30’s said she was raped Saturday and went to an area mechanic early that afternoon seeking a diagnostic test.

PC’s lawyer, Tony Carrales, said he believes the allegations stemmed from his client’s public proposal last Sunday to his girlfriend of five months, Porsche Zavolvo, at a Corpus Christi Hooks game.

PC the Patrol Car will take a voluntary leave of absence until the matter is resolved and plans to use vacation days he has accrued.

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