Category Archives: Low Classifieds

Low Classifieds

Looking for somebody to mow my lawn ASAP. Prefer someone willing to trade for advertising. Is there anyone out there mowing lawns in August who isn’t desperate for immediate cash and can appreciate the value of some old school marketing.


Starting a Book club! Sorry, this is only for hot girls that like fat dudes. We will be meeting every other Thursday at 11 pm. Literacy not required. Email Wil for more info


Looking for musicians to start an all-asthmatic Weezer cover band. Meet for practice Saturday at 4 pm at Arnold’s diner – have eaten. Just don’t bring too many dudes.


Contact Wil 361-549-6213

Looking for a Reggae band to play at my… never mind, I just found three in my driveway.

In search of woman with low self-esteem, for romantic encounter leading to possible abusive relationship and future miserable marriage ending in murder/suicide. Contact Wil Vent 361-549-6213

In search of tennis partner. Must be as fat as me. Contact Will 361-549-6213

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