Monthly Archives: July 2016

Slightly Random with Slightly Stoopid

By Wil Henneberger

Since the virgin age of 14 (circa 1994), I’ve had a love for all things Ska, Reggae, Dancehall or any other upbeat, guitar-muting or horn-laced genre I could aurally absorb. For as long as I have been listening to reggae, Slightly Stoopid has been playing it. Which, according to the 10,000-hour rule, makes them experts. Still, the laid-back, humble tone of the band’s personalities reflects anything but elitism and superiority, as demonstrated by the fact that one of them took the time to answer some of the most ridiculous questions I could come up with.

The Vent Daily: You guys are from San Diego, CA- Did you ever go to Tijuana when you were young and see the black and white stripe painted donkey and really think it was a Zebra? …cause I did.
zonkey
Ryan Moran: I know exactly what you’re talking about. I used to go to TJ a lot when I was like 18. Once you turn 21 it kind of loses its significance. Yeah, I went down there, I pretty much knew it was a donkey. It looks more like a donkey, not a Zebra.

NEWS FROM ACROSS THE POND: BREXIT

Tiggy Rawlston
International Bureau
Special to THE VENT

In a fiasco some 43 years in the making, the British people voted to withdraw from the European Union. The referendum on 23 June passed by an extremely narrow margin of less than 4 percentage points, but the major players on the far right have been quite vocal in their declaration of victory. “It’s all about preservation of British culture and pride,” bellowed Nidel Barrage at a rally just outside luxury department store Harrods. Barrage is the unofficial spokesperson of the Free British, the most powerful and obnoxious of the pro-Brexit movements which spearheaded the 2016 referendum. “We will take back our tiny nation from the clutches of those filthy frogs, with their filthy fucking waffles and buttery pastries!” he cried to the cheering crowd. “We will keep our crumpets, our busses and our fish and chips, and they can keep the gypsies, by God!”

666 Foot Upside-down Cross To Be Erected

The landscape along Interstate 37 near Carbon Plant road in Northwest Corpus Christi is about to change — in a big way.
In the middle of a field on the eastbound side of the interstate, a 666-foot tall upside-down cross will soon be built.
“It’ll be made of 5/8 inch cold-rolled steel, be welded, and put together in sections,” said Mick Rilby of Malevolent Life Fellowship. “The upside-down cross bar on the upside-down cross will be 195 feet wide. It will be 12 feet in diameter. The upside-down cross is so massive and so tall it will have a two-foot deflection at the top, it will actually sway in the wind two feet back and forth.”
Rilby and Lucy Phur of Malevolent Life Fellowship are the masterminds of the Corpus Christi Upside-down Cross Project. They got the idea after hearing of plans by a local, hateful pastor to erect a giant right-side-up cross.

Wake Up and Murica

Happy 240th Birthday to “The Greatest Country in the World”! At least that’s what it says on that coffee mug we got you for your 239th. You had a nice run Murica, but I’m going to go ahead and call it. Still, it’s pretty amazing what one can get done in just less than 2.5 centuries if they employ a little elbow grease, ingenuity, oh, and a whole lot of racism, sexism, and genocide.
Unfortunately all evidence points to the fact that this will be the last 4th of July we will actually celebrate as a sovereign country. By this time next year the nation will be in shambles and Trillary will be the least of our problems. Trillary? How’s its all going to happen? Glad you asked…
It’ll begin in just a couple of months when, in an effort to draw favor to the democrats before the crucial November election, Obama announces that the U.S. Government has perfected Artificial Intelligence. For once the republicans will be right when pointing their finger at the President.

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